Present Imperfect

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I'm Twelve! | January 16, 2005

Top Five Strictly Platonic Fantasies
(in reverse order for maximum suspense)
by Bronwyn Jones

5. Someone collapses in a crowded public space and I am able to save his or her life via my cunning (and, so far, imaginary) knowledge of CPR.

4. I know kung fu!

3. I am offered an insane deal on The Best House Ever by its exasperated former owners because — horrors! — it's haunted! I perform a quick exorcism (that does not involve a priest falling down a long flight of stairs) and/or come to a friendly arrangement with the spectral inhabitant and live there happily ever after.

2. At a rock show, the lead singer of a band I love asks for someone in the audience to come on up and sing backup. After much coaxing from my friends, I reluctantly take the stage. Impressed with my flawless harmonies, the band decides I am indispensable and takes me along on their world tour.

1. Magic is totally real and I'm awesome at it.

Funny, now that I've typed all that out, it seems awfully shallow, banal and childish.

I'm so glad I didn't write anything about how I envision myself when I'm fifty, living in an English cottage by the sea, walking my ethereal black Irish Wolfhound across windswept moors. Also, I collect rocks.

Written elsewhere.

You can find more of the interesting word usements I structure* on Apple.com.

Read my article, Better Writing Through Design, on No. 242 of A List Apart.

Pick up issue 176 of .net magazine to read my thoughts on creating outstanding web copy.

Watch a video of the Design Eye for South By panel at SXSW Interactive 2008. Or view the slide deck at DesignEye.org.

*With apologies to Harris K. Telemacher.