Present Imperfect

Self-Help by Lorrie Moore

"Begin to wonder what you do write about. Or if you have anything to say. Or if there even is such a thing as a thing to say. Limit these thoughts to no more than ten minutes a day; like sit-ups, then can make you thin. You will read somewhere that all writing has to do with one's genitals. Don't dwell on this. It will make you nervous." Read more...

The Dead Fathers Club by Matt Haig

"She said I hate God.
I said What?
She said I hate God.
I said Why?
She said Because he says you cant do things like you cant steal. But he steals. He steals people. He stole Dad and he let Mum die and he saw her in pain and he saw her praying and he didnt do anything. God just looks down at people asking him for help and he doesnt do anything because he knows if they are hurt theyll want to believe in him more and you wouldnt like a person like that so why like him just because hes God?" Read more...

The Astonishing Life of Octavian Nothing, Traitor to the Nation by M.T. Anderson

"The Latin for 'slave' — servus — as rendered in English literally is 'the spared one'; slaves being those taken prisoner in battle, who should, therefore, by all the rules of engagement, have been slain. In antiquity, slaves possessed no rights as citizens because, though spared, they were accounted dead, and as the dead, could not be admitted as living men; and so, for generations, the dead toiled and bred in Rome; the dead taught Rome's children the secrets of philosophy; the dead built Rome's great monuments and tombs; until the Romans themselves joined the dead, and all that remained were tombs, and monuments, and half-remembered terms." Read more...